Certifiable Test Case

Confused employee wading through Nerd Nirvana

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Location: Hyderabad, AP, India

Program Manager Microsoft IT India

Monday, May 22, 2006

Which left hand?

I have mastered a new art. The art of typing left handed on the keyboard.

Why? The inquisitive reader filled with curiosity, looks askance.

Because my right hand is in a sling. A curious contraption, this sling: it covers my arm from my hands to my elbows, forcing them horizontal, and has a long Velcro arm that wounds round my neck and holds itself in place.

Why? (why the sling, not why does it hold itself in place) The inquisitive reader raises his/her eyebrow as a polite gesture for me to continue.

The sling arose as a result of a small disagreement between my bike and me on Wednesday last in Virugambakkam, on the busy thoroughfare that is Arcot Road at three in the afternoon. After feeling my back tire wobble, I thought that it would continue in uniform motion along the straight road, as per Newton’s I law. My bike said, whoa, no way. It couldn’t care less about Newton’s I Law. It skid to a not-so-graceful halt, depositing yours truly on the side of the road upon his left side. And it (bike) fell upon me to boot, as my head lay on the road.

Luckily, my helmet saved my face from meeting a needle.

I was, of course, immediately helped up by the drivers behind me, and whisked away to the side of the road to recuperate. Which I did, and drove back home, feeling not so en bon sang but quite all right.

Of course, the doctors at the Emergency Ward at Ramachandra Hospital thought differently. After examining a couple of X-rays they came to the conclusion that what I had was an undisplaced fracture in the shoulder. What this means in layman’s terms is that a piece of bone over there wants to break off, but my skeletal system is being rather firm in holding on to it.

Way to go, skelly. Hang in there!

And so I have to wear the sling till this obstinate piece of calcium sees the flaw in its philosophy. Which, the good doctors say should be anytime in the next two weeks.

Until then, of course, I am left to explore the left-handers’ way of doing things. Isn’t there a Southpaws’ club somewhere here? Where do I sign up?


Anonymous Prashanth said...

You were helped up by the fellow citizens??

OMG! And i thought we were only supposed to help the women up! Did you turn into a woman or am I still being chauvinistic? :(

But really I should be sympathising with you rather than talking about this shouldn't I :D

2:48 AM  
Blogger Emperor said...

@Prash: every dog has his day da
woof woof

4:55 PM  

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